It's our favorite time of the year, Bachelorette season! Don't get me wrong, the Bachelor is all well and good, but for some reason man-tears and excessive male ego crushing just makes my Mondays 10x better.
Regardless of your show preference, we can all get behind the wonderful return of the League. This season we have a whopping 14 league participants, including three males. More participants = more money and more brie, so check out this season's point categories, stock up on wine, and set your Monday night DVR.
Due to the high demand, we have broken up the league into two league pools. Each pool is made up of 7 teams of 10. First place in each pool wins $50, second place wins $25, third place wins $15, and each pool's loser get a cheap-o bottle of wine (we're talking two-buck-chuck, because that is all a loser deserves).
Now, on to the important stuff...
After last season's snoozefest/douchbaggery, we were all craving some classic Bachelorette ridiculousness, and ABC did not disappoint. While I'm still under the impression that Andi is way too smart to be fooled into drinking the Bachelorette kool-aid, she sure did a good job of convincing the audience that she is 100% in this "for love." You do you, girl.
The men this season are a nice mix of juiceheads, salesmen, and wedding planners. We saw plenty of gimmicky entrances, including Macklemore/SeanLowe pushing a limo up the driveway. Mullet dude brought a floor lamp with him because nothing says "I like you" like stolen goods. Some soccer player actually had the guts to bring up 'ole JP in casual conversation (bold move, bro).After introductions and a few rounds of one-on-ones, ABC had a surprise for us. A mysterious man was at the front gate carrying roses and a heart full of love for Andi. Lo and behold, our mystery suitor was Chris P. from Emily's season and Bachelor Pad! Merry Christmas, viewers. Turns out that since Bachelor Pad, our buddy Chris has become pathetic and lost all the producers' phone numbers. Apparently he had been in LA for 10 days just waiting to crash Andi's first night and vie for Andi's affection. Andi rejects him and Chris Harrison, feeling useful again, has to let Chris P. down easy.
The whole Chris P. sitch took some time away from the actual suitors, so unfortunately, we only got about 2 seconds of opera singing out of Michigan man. Points-wise, this episode lacked in excitement.
Point Earning Highlights
Nick V. got the first impression rose earning him 5pts
Our two minorities both live to see another episode, earning 5pts each
She kept the wedding planner and tossed the helicopter pilot, like a chump
Team totals can be viewed here. Kelly's currently unnamed team is the only team still 10 for 10! Good luck, competitors. This season is shaping up to be a tough one.
Love and Roses,
Julie and Elizabeth
League Commissioners
Let's not forget the "Pantsepreneur" who presented Andi with a pair of persian rug pants and "anal" with an M.
ReplyDeleteAnd it seems like Andi kept the two minorities... but traded out Team Thor and their flowing blonde locks. Though I would have done the same to Dr. Creepster.